INSIGHT

I'd like to take the opportunity at this time to write regarding the idea of, and the difference between a player (aka a womanizer) and a playboy. Because there IS a difference. First and foremost for those of you looking to use the knowledge and tips you've acquired to increase your body count, kindly remove yourself from this page and add yourself to the all too bountiful ranks of loser-assholes. "That" I repeat "THAT IS NOT THE PURPOSE" of these columns. There are way too many of us walking around considering ourselves pimps, and why?  All because Kristie and Sheila didn't find out about each other. You're wrong. What is done in darkness shall always come to light and the only one you are misleading, is yourself. Quit the shenanigans fellas we are grown, or supposed to be (if you aren't fake it, the ladies are pretty good at that). Yes the allure of sleeping with many women carries seemingly positive perks in relation to how you're received by your fellow male audience. This however, is a farce, you owe it to yourself to exceed the expectations of what "we" as men consider the norm.

If you are of the very few men who know and understand they are always at least 3 steps behind a female, take your dominant hand, and pat yourself on the back. Women are the sharper sex among any number of species, and the only time they make mistakes is when their natural intuition is overshadowed by the calling of their much stronger emotional/maternal instincts. The purpose of life as relative to us and life itself, is to reproduce that's why you have your man-parts and she has her woman-parts, yet only the strong survive and as a result women thousands of years ago sought the strongest male of the group for a partner. If you break it down in the most basic format, look at most animals, the only time the male ever interacts with the female exclusively is to reproduce. Other than that everyone plays their role in the much greater web of things. Thankfully we know better and are aware women have a lot to offer emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically. But do you appreciate that? Thousands of years they've been fighting off advances from unworthy males, that's a lot of practice gentlemen. I assure you as soon as you approach a woman at the bar she can smell the stench of your ulterior motive and it offends all of her sensibility. We are products of a society that has made sex a mass marketing tool, but to suit whom? Men obviously. Two women playing tonsil hockey and "yeah's!!!" Are heard all around the room but ask a group of women if two guys kissing is attractive... Yeah. Exactly. Of course there are exceptions to every rule, but you'll find this one to almost always run true to form. 

Fast forward to 2010 you see a gorgeous woman and approach her, this instinctively fine tuned several thousand year old expert sorter of deserving suitors, with what plan of action? To compliment her physically on something(s) she could readily give to any other man of her choosing? A terrible mistake as women usually associate the target of your compliment/comment with what you want from and/or how you perceive her. Granted you don't approach her because her personality shines through the back of her dress but the try to find something that separates you from the rest. A woman's appearance is obviously where the attraction begins but the goal is to find out if her personality is as well rounded as her curves. Believe you me, a beautiful girl with a shallow personality is a burden that only one person is trained to deal with... A priest. 

My uncle told me a long time ago that "The true mark of a ladies man, is not how many women he can get, but how many he can turn down." Likewise my mother always taught me to "Leave every place a little better than you found it." This is what we as men miss. A so called "player" is in it for a good time not a long one and as a result his pursuit is empty. He wakes up next to a body feeling no better than the night before and is often soon in search of another in order to appease his insecurities. No confident man would disrespect a woman. A player therefore has no care for her feelings and thoughts and sees her as an object. His interests only go as far as what is inbetween her thighs. He is therefore a hater of woman, he logically carries disdain for the same item that is not only in all probability the source of his insecurity but in an ironic turn of events his escape from it. A playboy on the other hand is a lover of all things venus, not necessarily agreeing with everything but accepting it. He is patient and understanding of every emotional outburst, unnecessary "I love you" call, inconveniently imposed crunches on time, etc. He appreciates the female condition and see's them as the necessary part of an amazingly intricate equation.


"We never really know who we are until we've found someone we truly care for..." This then would hint that in order to know yourself and full potential absolutely, you need a woman. Most importantly, no woman, granted it was within your power and within reason (despite you not being together) should leave an encounter with you feeling jilted or deceived. Really try to set a higher bar and standard, and you'll see that your endeavors as a playboy, until you are fully ready to commit will be rewarded.

Till we meet again,

Cheers